when i ask if you would feel hurt if i cheated on you.i want to hear yes! it would devistate me.i would hate you.and if you hurt me this way,it would crush me so badly.what i hear is,i would understand.i dont want to cheat.i dont want any one else.and i dont want to end all this just cuz i feel a moment of fustration.i'm probably doing all the wrong things.maybe i should start to do the oposit of what i'm thinking.that has got to be the right thing.loveing you is all i know how to do.dispite all thats happened.and its also the scariets thing to do,because it involves trust.i guess you will have to trust me you say.but if i give,if i do will you hurt me? if i give you this trust that i protect will you then take it for granted and hurt me? i would miss you one hundred times what i miss you today if you were to go.and i miss you something terrible.will i ever wake up and see your smileing face again? will i wake up and fall in your arms and sigh that its all over,all the pain,all the fear all the hurt? will i ever see an end to the war? tantra says that i have to see the sky,not the clouds.i do see your sky,dispite the clouds.dispite the storm your blue and beautiful.as wide as eternity.and you are for ever.i just have to get out of the clouds.